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How to Call Out Toxic Behaviors at Work (Without Losing Your Cool)

  • Writer: J.Yuhas
    J.Yuhas
  • May 15
  • 3 min read

toxic behaviors

Toxic behaviors in the workplace can chip away at your confidence, peace, and productivity. But the real kicker? Most of us are conditioned to either stay silent or explode, neither of which helps us create lasting change.


The goal isn’t to “win” or call people out just to vent. It’s to advocate for yourself, create clarity, and stop absorbing dysfunction as if it’s your job.


Here's how to do it with calm authority.


10 toxic behaviors in the workplace with real-world scripts grounded in psychology:


1. Passive-aggressive comments in meetings

Behavior: Someone makes a dig masked as a joke (“Guess you finally got it right this time.”)

Psych Insight: Passive-aggression is often a mask for resentment or powerlessness. Don’t mirror it, clarify it.

Script: "Hey, I want to make sure we're on the same page. Was that a joke, or is there something we need to address more directly?"


2. Being repeatedly interrupted or talked over

Behavior: A coworker cuts you off consistently in meetings.

Psych Insight: This is often a dominance move or unconscious habit of desperation to be heard. Either way, it erodes your sense of value.

Script: "If you don’t mind, I’d like to finish my thought. I think it adds to the direction we’re heading. Can we come back to your point right after?"


3. Gaslighting after giving feedback

Behavior: You offer constructive feedback and the person denies it ever happened or blames you.

Psych Insight: Gaslighting destabilizes your reality to avoid accountability.

Script: "It sounds like we're remembering this differently. I'm open to clarifying. Can you share your perspective on what you recall taking place?”


4. Credit stealing

Behavior: A colleague takes credit for your idea or work.

Psych Insight: This is often rooted in insecurity or a need for external validation.

Script: "I'm glad the idea is being well received. I’d love to share more about how I developed it and what I’ve learned in the process."


5. Micromanagement

Behavior: A supervisor over-controls every detail of your work.

Psych Insight: Micromanaging often stems from anxiety and a lack of trust.

Script: "I appreciate your input and want to stay aligned. To do my best work, I also need some autonomy. Can we discuss a balance on how to create trust in the process?”


6. Backchannel gossip

Behavior: You find out coworkers are discussing you behind your back.

Psych Insight: Gossip creates triangulation, a substitute connection with control.

Script: "If there’s ever feedback about me, I’d really appreciate hearing it directly. I value transparency over confusion."


7. Double standards

Behavior: You're held to a higher standard than others in similar roles.

Psych Insight: Often unconscious bias or power misuse.

Script: "I’ve noticed I’ve been handling X while others in equivalent roles haven’t been as involved. I want to check in to see if there’s a strategic reason for that, or if we need to realign so responsibilities are distributed more evenly."



toxic behaviors

8. Exclusion from decisions

Behavior: You’re left out of important meetings or communications that directly impact your role.

Psych Insight: Exclusion is a subtle form of control or punishment.

Script: "It seems I wasn’t looped into X, even though it affects my work. Is there a better system we can use to make sure I’m included in the future?"


9. Emotional dumping

Behavior: A coworker constantly vents to you without boundaries.

Psych Insight: This is emotional enmeshment masquerading as connection.

Script: "I want to support you, but I also need to manage my focus. Can we chat about this over lunch or after work?"


10. Stonewalling or silence as punishment

Behavior: After a disagreement, someone ignores you or gives the silent treatment.

Psych Insight: Stonewalling is a passive way to assert power and avoid vulnerability.

Script: "I’ve noticed some distance between us after our last conversation. I’m open to reconnecting when you’re ready."


Don’t Absorb the Behavior. Observe It.

The key to calling out toxic behavior is to stay grounded in self-respect, not self-defense. You’re not responsible for how someone reacts. You’re responsible for how you respond.


Reacting comes from the ego, while responding comes from our values. 


Conflict resolution scripts:

  • Acknowledge the behavior without enabling it or attacking the person

  • Set workplace boundaries without escalation

  • Build relational clarity instead of emotional chaos


You deserve a work environment that respects your dignity. If that’s not the culture you're in, these tools will help you shift the micro-dynamics, one honest conversation at a time.



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